Beautiful Blue...

That shade of blue sky...those lilacs bursting into bloom...a hint of clouds...but that blue...that blue...that beautiful, perfect blue...what a way to end the month of May...I'm grateful for every May that I get to look at that colour of beautiful blue sky...

10 Rules of Life

If you have about 10 minutes to sit back with a coffee or a tea, this is a worth watching video by Willow Wing...remember...life doesn't always have to be serious...Check out Willow Wing's work here.

Embracing Imperfections...

Sharing my lumpectomy scar the other day started me thinking about flaws and imperfections. Many years ago I was bothered and aware, sometimes even to the point of being self-conscious, of my slightly crooked top front teeth. Money wasn't something we had a lot of when I was a child and a teenager, in fact, it was often very tight. There weren't dental plans as expansive as they are today. I had the option at 16 of having braces, at a cost to my mother and to myself, but at the time a trip to Italy was much more appealing and I reasoned that the opportunity to travel at that cost (and with those friends) would not present itself again. I reasoned that I had much to gain from a trip like that so I chose Italy over braces. It seemed to me that down the road, if I still wanted braces, I could take care of that myself. I chose fun and adventure over how I looked. If I had to make the decision again today, I'd make the same choice.

Roll forward many years and I never did bother with the braces though I thought about once or twice (or more). I either didn't have the time or the inclination. Sometimes I'd smile into the mirror and think, "if you change these teeth now you are changing who you are." There were times when I'd see my smile in a photograph and be dismayed because on some level that "imperfection" still managed to find it's way underneath my skin as a "flaw", one that was now on record.

I know at times I would try to hide my smile or cover my mouth when I laughed. Where did this insecurity over my smile come from? Likely from friends or people I knew (come to think of it, how could they be "friends" if they would feel it necessary to point out my "imperfections"?) asking me about my teeth or commenting on how uneven they were, or that one on the top was further back than all the others. I'd hear these comments and obviously they burrowed their way into my subconscious. I'd wonder why they felt free and easy to make these comments to me when I didn't ask them about their "flaws" or pass comment. People know what they look like. They know if they have a mole or a birthmark. They know if they have crooked teeth, thin hair or warts. What is gained by telling someone about an "imperfection"? Nothing as far as I'm concerned.

I look at the scars on my body -- from my cesareans, from my splenectomy, from my lumpectomy, from my hernia when I was 2 (I had an outy belly button!), from my axillary dissection after 1 lymph node was discovered to contain cancer cells...and I think...I don't stress over these "imperfections". I accept them and sometimes feel quite proud of what I have overcome.

Makes my crooked teeth pale in comparison to really nothing at all. Puts everything into proper perspective and I realize that each and every imperfection in this body of mine really does make me just "who" I am.

*image from tmtunes.com

A Little Bit of Heaven...

Every now and then I need to have a "fix". It could be anything but it's usually something that I have fond memories of from childhood, or something I've been reading about that triggers a memory. Or like this. On the weekend, being in the grocery store and seeing a package of fern tarts. I didn't buy them immediately...I looked and smiled. But the next day I went back hoping they still had some in stock..and they did.

Fern tarts were something my mother enjoyed as a child and as mothers do, she introduced them into her own home to her own children. I remember my mother telling me how her brother would tease her by telling her what was inside the tarts (usually to do with bug bits and other less savoury ideas!) so that my mother would refuse her tart and he would be able to have it. Sounds about right to me (isn't this the kind of thing all older siblings do to the younger ones?). I have no idea how long it took before my mother clued in to what he was up to! What is inside? A delightful mixture..depending on who has baked them...jam (strawberry or raspberry), coconut, walnuts, and cake are the usual ingredients. A nice flaky tart crust and then royal icing with a cocoa fern decorated on top. Heaven in a tart tin!

The best fern tarts come from the bakeries in small towns. I love to go into bakeries whenever I travel to see what they have on offer. If they have fern tarts and empire biscuits I am truly in heaven! Those bakeries are bestowed my 5 star Sherry's guide rating! For those who may not know, an empire biscuit is two cookies (sugar or shortbread) with raspberry jam in the middle. The top is iced with royal icing and there is a half demi glace cherry on top. The edges of the biscuit are scalloped, but can be rounded.

Out of the package of 6 tarts (these from a British bakery here in town) I managed to get 1. It seems I've done the same as my mother did and introduced these to my children who know a good thing when they find it! Think it's time to tell them what all the "bits" are inside those tarts!!!

Fade Away...

You're looking at this photograph and you're wondering what on earth is this? What could this be a photograph of?

Look closely into the middle of the photograph...do you see the line running through the middle? That's my right breast, at the side...just to the side and under the arm pit...the line in the middle of the photograph is the scar from my lumpectomy which I had in June of 2005. The scar is approximately 3" long.

Sara who writes Cancer Ain't Gonna Beat Me shared a photograph of her recent lumpectomy scar which is now 3 months old. I looked at that photograph yesterday and was reminded of when my scar was that fresh. Sara's idea was to share her scar so that anyone else who might be faced with a lumpectomy would see what it looks like post surgery to take some of the potential fear out of that. I decided I would share my scar as well...you see how faded it is and what an excellent job my surgeon made of his work. I rarely think about this scar anymore and I certainly don't even "notice" it to be honest. But whenever I am reminded or I do notice it I smile at what my body has endured. Just one more memory on the road map of my body to accompany the scar from the caesarean sections which brought me my children and the scar from the splenectomy that saved my life. Souvenirs I can trace from the trip of life.

The Merry Merry Month of May...

I love the month of May. I have always loved this month, more than any other, and likely always will. Even though I've had bad news happen to me in May -- my parents separated in May when I was 15; I had a breast cancer diagnosis in May...doesn't matter and it cannot dampen or change how I feel. There is something that fills my soul about May and always fills me with hope...the flowers, the deep blue sky, the birds (the mess they leave on the windshield of my car, not so much...), the warmth of the air, the warmer breeze, even the rain. What is not to like about May? This is just a sample of what I saw in my garden the other day.

*edited to add..the flowers from top to bottom are lilacs, bleeding heart and forget-me-nots.

En Provence...

Is there somewhere that you've dreamed of visiting? Somewhere you've dreamed of living? I have this "love affair" with France. I've never been, I may never go. You'll laugh if I tell you I think I've lived there before, in a past life, in the 1800s. Is it a coincidence that my parents gave me a French name at a time when everyone else had "the usuals" for names? Was it fun as a child when people called me Shirley, Shelley, Cheryl, Sharon...all names that were "usuals"? Okay, it annoyed me no end but I learned to live with it and I learned to like that I had a more unusual name.

I love the colours of Provence, the decor, the je ne sais quoi that makes Provence what it is -- lavender, the wines, the food. I'm hooked and only through what I have seen and what I have read. Maybe it's the simplicity of life in small villages that appeals.



When I walked casually through the travel section at the library I happened upon Yvone Lenard's "The Magic of Provence", loved the colour and photograph of the cover and brought it home. I've been savouring it ever since.

This book is a tribute to the small village, Ansouis, and the life that Yvone and her husband Wayne share when they are "at home" (the other half of "at home" is in California). Unlike travel books that tell you where to visit, what to eat, the highlights of a visit,Yvone recalls neighbours, anecdotes and stories about life in the village and surrounding area. Written with love, humour, candor and spirit, Yvone makes you feel like you are there with her.

Included with each chapter are recipes of dishes that Yvone has talked about...an added bonus to be sure. Last night I made the tarte aux courgettes (zucchini tart) and it was amazing...wonderful flavours and just enough to serve as an appetizer for 4. I'm happy to share...the recipe that is...the tarte is gone!



Tarte Aux Courgettes
Yvone Lenard from "The Magic of Provence"

Slice zucchini, unpeeled, and saute in olive oil until soft and just a little browned (this caramelizes the sugar in the vegetables and brings out their flavour).

Spread crust with Dijon mustard. Place zucchini on top, in an even layer, about 1 inch thick. Season well with salt, pepper, and a little thyme and tarragon. Arrange small cubes of Gouda or Swiss cheese (I used Gouda) on top, so they form a pattern as they melt.

Bake at 350 F until the crust is browned and the cheese has melted and browned slightly.


For more information about Yvone Lenard, her book, or life in Provence, please check her website.

That's What I Like About...

Yesterday I was reading Lelainia's blog and she had compiled a list of things she likes. At the end of the post, Lelainia asked her readers what they like...so here's my list. I won't say it's complete but the more I thought the more ideas came to me.

I like rain...listening to it fall, watching it fall, walking in it, smelling it. I like it when there is loud thunder, like a symphony in the sky.

I like flowers...columbines, hyacinths, peonies, daisies, old English roses, tulips, yarrow, black eyed susans.

I like water....oceans, lakes, rivers, streams, my shower, swimming pools...I like listening to the tides, the motion of the waves...I like looking at it...I like the ripples and the reflections. I like to be in it. I like to swim.

I like beaches...feeling the sand between my toes, walking along a beach, sitting on a beach, reading on a beach.

I like sunshine...feeling it on my skin, seeing it in the leaves on the trees.

I like clouds...watching them float, watching them to see what shapes they make.

I like babies. I like their tiny feet, their smiles and giggles. I like the way they smell. I like the chubbiness of their cheeks and their fly-away soft hair.

I like hugs. I like touching and kissing the tops of my children's heads.

I like to travel. I like Italy and South Carolina. I like California, Boston, and New York City. I like Montreal and Vancouver. I like Nova Scotia and Prince Edward Island.

I like to read...mysteries, biographies, best selling fiction, good chick lit, classics, historical novels, history, British history. I like finding new authors to enjoy. I like libraries and book stores.

I like bracelets and earrings. I like silver rather than gold. I like scarves and accessories. I like Bohemian style. I like flip flops and all kinds of shoes and boots. I like purses and hand bags. I like totes made out of straw. I like hats and caps. I like jackets. I like white t-shirts and blue jeans. I like to wear my hair up in a clip sometimes. I like sweaters. I like things with a leopard print.

I like Christmas and everything about it...the food, the music, the decorating, the goodwill, the joy, the peace.

I like tea in a bone china cup and saucer...I like orange pekoe, earl grey, rooibos, chamomile, green...and I love to have a scone or a biscuit with my tea. I drink my tea black...I like it that way.

I like coffee...regular, decaf, Americano, Cappuccino, Cinnamon Dolce Latte, Vanilla Latte...I like my coffee in a thick mug and I like it black (unless it's a latte or cappuccino). I like to have a cinnamon bun, biscotti or something else sweet with my coffee.

I like date squares, the ones like my mother used to make. I like sugar pie from Quebec. I like pecan pie...I like croissants...plain, chocolate or almond.

I like comfort food...I like Greek food and Italian food. I like berries...raspberries, blueberries, black berries, strawberries. I like them as they are right out of my hand. I like them with whipped cream. I like them on my cereal. I like salsa. I like tomatoes in salad or sandwiches...a tomato sandwich with salt and pepper and a little bit of mayonnaise. I like salads of all kinds. I like cinnamon toast. I like black olives. I like potato salad and a cold beer in the summer. I like goat cheese. I like McDonald's french fries. I like root beer. I like ice cream...soft from Dairy Queen or something with nuts or butterscotch. I like caramel. I like tootsie rolls, rolo candy, dark chocolate, peanut butter cups, fern tarts.

I like early mornings. I like to listen to the birds and hear the day start before all the additional noise takes over. I like reading in bed. I like my soft blue fleece. I like to snuggle under the duvet.

I like nail polish but only on my toes. And only in the summer time.

I like limes.

I like massages and meditation. I like relaxing. I like reading trashy magazines when I'm at the hairdresser. I like someone else washing or brushing my hair. I like dreaming. I like journals.

I like photography, old keys, art, creativity, colour, design. I like research and details. I like discovery. I like to laugh and to sing. I like music...classical, soft rock...I like the sound of violins and strings in an orchestra. I like how it makes me feel light and airy when I hear those strings.

I like dogs and horses. I like butterflies and dragonflies. I robin's eggs.

I like Dr. Seuss, Winnie the Pooh, Little Red Riding Hood.

I like honesty, loyalty and respect. I like random acts of kindness. I like friendliness, smiles, hope, spirit and empathy.

I like the smell of vanilla and magnolia. I like the smell of fresh laundry either just off the line or from the dryer.

I like watching my sons play sports. I like a good party. I like sharing thoughts and ideas. I like my life. I like second chances. I like myself. Apparently I also like talking about myself!!

If you think you'd like to share the things you like, come back and leave me a link so I can see what makes your world wonderful.

Beautiufl...U.R.

Loving Deborah Cox -- her voice, her words...this song is at the top of my list...this video is worth a watch. Why? Because you're worth it...

Dependency...

I swore I'd never be this person. I swore I would never let anything dominate or control my life. I swore I would know my limit, that I could practice moderation.

Sadly, I cannot. I am this person. I have let this control my life.

I seem to have become a slave to....my computer!!! Ack!



No internet service (for too long!) because of a problem at the main cable box. I started to salivate and drool and I could feel my nerves begin to fray. I was jumpy and skittish and couldn't settle to anything else.

All is well now...the problem has been corrected and here I am, back in my chair.

That said, I think I'll go and talk a walk. I need to show this computer who is really in charge around here!!!

The Bright Side of Disaster....

I love the title of this charming book by Katherine Center. Call me Pollyanna, go on, it's all right, really. You wouldn't be the first to do so. You won't be the last either I'm sure. Looking on the sunny side, looking for the silver lining in a dark, black cloud, that's me. I've always been a "glass half full" kind of person. I just wouldn't know how to be anything else. Am I always "Sally Sunshine"? 24/7? Of course not...there are down days, there are sad days, but within those kind of days, I can usually manage to find a flicker of something positive. And if not that day, then the day after that.

That's what Katherine Center is talking about through the life of her main character Jenny. The book begins with this sentence:

The end began with a plane crash.

As the book reaches it's conclusion we realize that what Jenny really meant was:

"the end of the life I thought I was going to have.”

Isn't that quite often the way life is? We can plan and design. We can dream and create. We can work towards a specific goal. And then seemingly out of nowhere the life that we thought we were going to have is changed. Sometimes it's by something drastic and dramatic. Sometimes it's a small event, something that happened to someone else but impacts our life, shifting the sands that may well only have been supporting a house of cards.

When I had finished reading Katherine's book, I was reminded of this quote, one that I refer to often:

We must be willing to get rid of the life we’ve planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us.

Joseph Campbell

In Praise of Laughter...

Life can be serious. Sometimes it's very serious. Other times it's just plain silly. There are times when life is being it's most serious that I find laughter to be the antidote, the tonic, the best medicine at my fingertips.

On Monday I was reading one of my latest favourite blogs, Holy Mackerel, and I just loved this post of Mary's. It made me laugh out loud ~ I love her wit and her humour and her turn of phrase, and the photographs that accompany this post are priceless.

Thanks Mary for keeping my endorphins flowing!

*photo originally uploaded to photobucket by joey290384

The Butterfly Effect...

I was so pleased and touched by some of the comments left regarding this post about the butterfly necklace Carolyn made for me. Butterflies have a tremendous significance for me, and it appears they do for others as well. Here are some of the comments that touched me.

This one from Paula at Little Scraps of Magic:

Butterflies hold a special place in my heart. As my mother lay dying of breast cancer, we asked her to send us a sign that she was okay. My sister asked her to send a butterfly. As we carried out her coffin, the air was filled with hundreds of butterflies. It was magical.Since then, mom has come to us in butterflies...a butterfly in January in PA is a rare sight. She's perched on my dad's finger, and she's lit down on the wing of an airplane to calm my sister. She's even played jokes.Your butterfly is beautiful!

And this one from Sara Williams:

Following a dose of chemo, I couldn't sleep and was awake most of the night it seemed. At about 3.30am I saw a vibrant blue butterfly before me, it turned into a flame then disappeared. I asked my friend what it meant and she told me it was healing sent with love xx

The similarity and the significance is that all three of us have been touched by breast cancer. There is something that we cannot explain about how this mystery with butterflies works but in truth, we really don't need the explanation. It's enough that we believe.

While scrolling around through blogs, I came across this one by Kathryn, Secrets of a Butterfly. I left a comment on Kathryn's blog and then Kathryn came to visit my blog. She left this beautiful comment:

i particularly got alot from this post and from the comments left by your lovely friends and readers about the significance of butterflies to them.

i have an affinity to butterflies too for freedom and transformation. because i spent 10 years in bed ill,through my twenties, which was like a cocoon, as i wasnt able to leave the room or be outside during that time.when my health improved a few years ago, you can imagine how wonderful even the smallest day to day things, and smallest bits of experiencing nature felt like, after so long!

maybe thats the joy a butterfly feels when it gets its wings and leaves the chrysalis.thats why my blog is called secrets of a butterfly.

Once again, I am taken with the impact and the significance that butterflies have brought to someone's life. And I'm reminded about the close affinity we share with nature, that everything is connected by ways and means that are invisible to our eyes, but are there nonetheless.

There is something wonderful about being reminded how the everyday in our lives has such value. The life of a butterfly is short. After a difficult struggle to emerge, it knows instinctively how to make the most of what little time it has.

*photograph originally uploaded to flickr by NaPix -- Hmong Life May 2008

An Article Well Worth Sharing

From the Toronto Star
Biologist sees golden age of cancer research
May 12, 2009

Megan Ogilvie HEALTH REPORTER

For Dr. Ben Neel, the way forward has never looked so clear.
The renowned cancer cell biologist is confident scientists around the world are entering, what he calls, a golden age of cancer research. That those hours spent toiling at the lab bench – the basic research on which he, and countless others, have built their careers – will soon lead to new, more personalized cancer treatments for patients.
"There is a long lag time – maybe 20 years – for basic discoveries to wind their way into the therapeutic or translational realm," says Neel, director of the Campbell Family Cancer Research Institute at Princess Margaret Hospital.
Given the recent explosion in scientists' understanding of basic cell processes, especially their knowledge of mutations that occur in cancer cells, Neel says new therapies are not far behind.
"The Princess Margaret Hospital has a tagline – conquer cancer in our lifetime," he says. "For people who are below 40, I'm very confident that's not just a tagline, that's a promise."
Neel, who was recruited from Harvard Medical School in 2006 to head up cancer research at Princess Margaret, is known for his research in normal and tumour cell signalling. Tuesday night, Neel was awarded a Premier's Summit Award in medical research.
The $5-million award – a $2.5 million contribution from the award program and $2.5 million from Princess Margaret – will, in part, he says, go towards hiring chemists to develop new compounds that can block cell signals that lead to cancer.
Recently, Neel agreed to answer some questions about his work from the Star.

Most people probably don't know that our cells signal to each other. How do you explain cell signalling?

Cells in your body receive a bevy of signals of all different types. Some of those signals are things like hormones – insulin, for example, is a signal, growth hormone is a signal. There are also signals delivered from the attachment of cells to the underlying surface, what we call the extra cellular matrix. And a third type of signal is when cells touch each other.
All of these signals are received simultaneously by every cell in your body. And cells have to receive all of those signals, figure out what they all mean, and come up with a biological response.

Why is it important to study cell signalling?

In a nutshell, studying signal transduction is trying to understand how normal cells respond to all those different types of signals, how those different types of signals are transduced into a particular cellular response, and ultimately – what we are interested in and what a lot of labs are interested in worldwide – is how, when those signals are deranged, you get a disease state.

How do you split your time between your own research lab and as leader of one of the largest research institutes in North America?

Well, I tried not sleeping for a while, but that didn't work out too well. (Laughs)
I have two offices, one at the lab and one for administration. I try to spatially and temporally split my time. And, you know, we all work really hard. I want the public to know they get a really good bang for their buck from scientists. You won't find a class of people in general who are harder working.
When I was a tenured professor at Harvard ... I sometimes didn't come in on the weekends at all. Now, I work a whole Saturday – in the lab, because there are no administrative responsibilities – and I almost always work half a Sunday at home. I increased my hours to make up for the two jobs.

It must be a sign that you love what you do, that you can commit so much time.

Yeah, either that or I'm a crazy obsessive, I don't know. (Laughs)
It (scientific study) becomes an addiction after a while, you have to do it. What is different about science than most other jobs is that you are always trying to find out new things. So there is no limit to the amount of time you can spend thinking about your problem. And, if you feel that you've thought that problem to death, you can move on to the next problem.
There are 15 different projects in my lab ... and I'm always trying to think about new things. So you can spend 100 per cent of your time thinking about projects.

What are your thoughts about the future of cancer research? Are we going in the right direction?

Most of us in the field think we have reached a tipping point in the battle against cancer. In the next 15 to 20 years, we are going to see dramatic changes.
It's important to remember that we have already seen quite dramatic changes in certain malignancies. Childhood leukemia, Hodgkin's disease, these were death sentences. Now, they are almost always cured.
I think that what we are all hoping for, and we think is realistic, is that we'll start to see those types of cures, along with better detection, in major adult cancers like lung cancer, colon cancer, and breast cancer. I'm very optimistic.

You've been in Toronto just over two years now. It's too late for first impressions, but what do you like best about the city?

From a professional level, I've been totally impressed. Everybody who does biomedical research knows Toronto is one of the top three or four centres in North America, and therefore worldwide. That has totally been reinforced by my experience here. I'm looking out the window at all the great institutions along University Avenue ... there is just an amazing collection of scientific talent here that is hard to match in most places.

But you spent much of your career in Boston ...

Boston is Boston and it has the greatest depth and breadth of science anywhere in the world. But Toronto is in the next tier.
From a lifestyle perspective, our lifestyle is way better here than in Boston. Toronto is a big, world-class city. There is a lot to do here. On the few occasions when I do take off, we drive to Stratford or Niagara-on-the-Lake. Last night we went to the Soulpepper theatre.
And I can walk to work! I used to have drive 30 minutes to work every day in one of the worst commutes anywhere.

Well, thanks very much for your time ...

Oh, you have to get this in! Despite many efforts to the contrary, I will be rooting for the Red Socks when they come here to play against the Blue Jays. That's a major cultural advantage of being in Toronto, you can always get tickets to see the Jays play the Red Sox. You can't do that in Boston.

Be Funky...

After yesterday's post about being one of the "beautiful people", the wonderful Bodhi Chicklet's comment about turning the photo into something funky from the BeFunky website had me laughing and enjoying my time there. Here then is what happens when you "funkify" yourself!! Check it out and have some fun and share what you've done -- come back and leave a link if you do!

What They Missed...

The other day, Beth was talking about the latest issue of "Hello Canada" and it's 50 most beautiful people issue, marvelling at the fact that they had neglected to call her and include her in the list. I could relate. I wasn't in it either and when I began to think about it I realized that the editors had made a gross error. Why weren't we called?!?!

A few days later we met, as previously planned, for lunch where we share thoughts, insights, and more deep than that, laughter.

Before we moved on to Chapters to book browse, and to Starbucks for refreshment, we made a pit stop to use the facilities. While in there (amid much loud laughter) we used the mirror so we could take our own photograph for "Hello Canada"...consider this one "air brushed" and "pouty" .. remember we don't have a team to do all the work for us...



Laughter and parody aside, as far as I'm concerned the most beautiful people in this country (in the world actually) are not celebrities and people with the money to enhance their looks. The most people beautiful people are those who live in this world everyday by living their lives simply and with love and joy. Beautiful people give from their hearts, do good works, care for their families, support their friends, respect themselves and others.

Why on earth do tabloid/magazine publishers feel we "need" to know who "they" (or their readers) think are the most beautiful people? Against what criteria?

I've said it before...look in the mirror right now -- you've just met one of your country's most beautiful people.

Butterfly Wings...

Sometimes people just surprise you -- not that who they are is the surprise (though sometimes that is very true), or what they do surprises you (though again, sometimes that is true too), I'm talking about being surprised in such a good way by something wonderful someone has done for you.

I love butterflies for what they symbolize more than anything else. I find them hopeful and free (once they are out of their cocoon and can fly), light and airy and full of optimistic possibilities.

A few years ago I had a henna tattoo of a butterfly done over my left breast. Just for fun and I loved the exhilaration of knowing it was there. It was only a year later that I was diagnosed with breast cancer in the opposite breast. I found that very meaningful.

My friend Carolyn knows how I feel about butterflies. I believe she also knows how I feel about surprises!! I was reading her blog on Monday and was delighted with this beautiful butterfly that she had created out of leather. Imagine my excited surprise when I opened my mail on Tuesday and there was the butterfly waiting for me with a card letting me know that this butterfly necklace had actually been created with me in mind...for me!

Carolyn makes other beautiful items which you must check out in her shop.

Thank you so much Carolyn for gracing me with this gift of beauty and friendship. I will wear it proudly and often! ♥

Can You Judge a Wine By The Label?

When this is the label? But of course! I was looking for a nice white to take to my mother-in-law's for dinner on Sunday and saw this as I was walking down the aisle...

I love the beach and I would love a beach house and this label is fabulous. It's a sauvignon blanc from South Africa...and it's really refreshingly good!

I love how I managed to capture the sunlight and blend in the lime with this photograph! Just like being at the beach!!



When I was at the counter to pay, the cashier told me that this is new to the product line and she couldn't wait to try it. Apparently there was a write up in last week's newspaper and people were in looking for it but it hadn't yet arrived. I must have been one of the first in that store. The woman in line behind me was asking about it and ran to the aisle to grab a bottle. Great price point too -- under $10. Hope she enjoyed it as much as I did!

I left the bottle at my mother-in-law's so I'll just have to buy another bottle, just to look at it!

Organic Canvas Carry Alls...

The trend today and of the future is to "be green", and to think of the environment. Many of us are already using our own bags for our grocery shopping and the use of the plastic bag is meant to fade into the "past". Many of the chain grocery stores offer their own cloth bags for you to purchase for approximately $1.00 and while they are serviceable (to a point), they are not really very attractive. Long wearing they often are not.

I think of the women in Europe who shop with their totes and baskets and how chic that looks. Grocery shopping is not a chic event, it is really a necessary chore, one we carry out in order to eat and feed our families. That said, there is no reason why we cannot look, and feel a little more elegant when we make this trip. True enough, many of us shop for a week at a time and not daily as they do in Europe so one chic little basket will hardly do the job.

What about trips to the library or the beach, carrying items for your children or for the commuter to take on the train for books, umbrellas, a lunch perhaps (for those feeling the pinch in the economy who have decided it's time to return to the brown bag)?

Kimberly of Mimi Charmante creates some of the most fabulous organic canvas tote bags which she sells in her shop, Little Blue Bird Studio. At present she lists shipping only to the U.S. but if you live elsewhere and send her a conversation, I'm sure she would consider arranging purchase and shipping costs.

*photographs are from Little Blue Bird Studio and are not to be copied.

Silverlime

Last month I entered a giveaway at Leaca's blog, which was sponsored by Traci Platts Haycock who is the mastermind behind The Silverlime. Entrants were to tell their story, because every life has a story...mine was chosen the winner. I was totally shocked, speechless (not easy to believe!) and thrilled.

*(I had a request for the post where I had shared my story...you will find it here.)

A few conversations between creator and winner, and I had chosen what I wanted my winnings to be, and it arrived the other day.

The phrase I chose says "each day is a gift" which is so appropriate for me -- I actually say that every morning. For the charm, I chose a leaf because it symbolizes life, rebirth, renewal and hope.

Please take a moment to check out Traci's website and see the other beautiful options she has.

Thanks again Traci for your generosity and to Leaca for offering the giveaway!!

*top photo from Leaca's blog, Simply Blogged

For Mother's Day ♥

Leaca at Simply Blogged posted this meme yesterday and offered it to any who would like to participate.

My mother passed away in 1997 and in honour of her memory, I thought I would participate as it isn't possible to give her a gift or a card. This photograph was the last one taken of us together, Christmas 1996.


1. What are some traits that you have picked up from your mother (whether you like it or not)?

I learned to be resourceful in times of stress, distress or difficulty. I learned to be kind to others, to offer a helping hand and to do so without any motive other than kindness and doing a good deed. I inherited her sense of humour and her wit.

2. What is your mother's favorite flower?

She loved gladiolus. She very much disliked carnations (always, always reminded her of funerals and if she could smell carnations and there were none around, she knew someone was going to die..she was never wrong).

3. What is a memory of your mother that you go to often?

When I'm sad or down or need a hug, I think of all the times my mother was there for me when I was ill or struggling with something. My mother wasn't a great one for hugs but she had a way of letting you know that no matter what you needed, she would move heaven and earth to make it happen.

4. What is your favorite feature about your mom? (scent, eyes, skin, smile, personality trait).

Her hands. I loved looking at my mother's hands, holding her hand, watching her work.

5. What is your favorite meal your mother made? treat that she baked?

This could fill pages!!! I loved her porcupine balls -- ground beef rolled in white rice, baked and then covered with tomato soup. My mother was not a gourmet...simple fare always prepared with love (and on a budget!). I also loved her macaroni and cheese either made with cheese or one she'd make with cream of celery soup. Both were foods I would request as comfort food during an illness or recovery. Her baking? Mouth watering cinnamon sticky buns, cookies, shortbread, mincemeat squares, date squares, brownies (from scratch!) with walnuts and icing!

6. Are there any mothers other than your own that you honour or think about on Mother’s day?

My mother-in-law. And when my sister was alive, my boys always gave her a card and a gift for an aunt on Mother's Day as she was unmarried and had no children of her own, but was like a little mother to my boys.

In for a Penny....

Actually, you can be in for "nothing"...

Carolyn over at Magpie-Pixie is having a blogaversary (two years!!) giveaway...check out this post to enter.

Here's what she's made for the giveaway (isn't it fabulous?)...maybe I shouldn't share as it will lessen my chances, but hey, I'm willing to take the chance...the more the merrier!

Time of My Life...

...this is what's making me feel good these days...and I believe every word.

A Little Help...

Along with getting older, comes all of the various "accoutrements". It seems to be a slow start...a pair of glasses needed for reading when you notice your arm being held away from your body to read the fine print (optometrists call this "the 40 arm reach"...there is a "50 arm reach" as well apparently!), perhaps an orthotic appliance for your shoes as you notice plantar fasciatis or your arches falling a little.

Then we reach the stage where our bodies (naturally and sometimes because of other medications we've needed to take or other treatments..or in my case, both) require a little additional help with medications and vitamins.

Taking one or two per day isn't really a problem, other than the other age slip -- the loss of memory and the refrain of "why did I come into this room?" or "what was it I was looking for?" or "where are my glasses?" The difficulty of remembering if I have taken a particular pill in a day was a minute irritation, which blossomed as my doctor added pills to my "arsenal".

One for cholesterol, some calcium, how about a little Vitamin D with that? Ugh. I finally surrendered and purchased a pill case with the days of the week. Yes, I felt like a "little old lady" in doing so but along with the laughs it has afforded me, I find I am actually stressing less about "did I take this one already?"

I bumped into a friend the other day and as we were chatting and catching up, I happened to mention my pill dispenser...and with a flourish, she proudly pulled out the one she keeps in her purse.

Ah well, misery loves company!! But I happen to think we're pretty clever chicks (and I noticed she was wearing open toed sandals and not orthotic lace ups...I think we're good to go for a little while yet before we need to look at those zimmer frames!).

A Long Ago May...

A rumpled, crumpled, stained old photograph. Someone butchered my bangs...must have used hedge clippers to cut them. The coat was a soft spring green, the hat had beautiful white flowers (and a strap underneath that dug into my chin when tied too tightly). The purse was like hard straw and the gloves were so dainty, so very lady-like.

A klutz I was at age 3 in a May long ago (and still am). Graceful didn't fit into my vocabulary. I was always in a hurry (still am), many places to get to, and not enough time to see them all. Every crack in the sidewalk or bit of uneven pavement saw me coming and raised itself even higher. With my head in the clouds I must have thought I had wings.

Always optimistic, I was happy to share my injury with the willing audience. I can almost hear myself saying "see what I did?", not "see what happened to me". Every wrinkle, every scar, every badge of honour of being able to say "I was here." "This is what I did." "Look at me, I'm still standing even so."

Bad things happen. Sometimes there isn't a "happy ending". It's what we do with the time between the "bad thing" and everything else that turns existing into living.

The Mammogram That Changed My Life...

Four years ago today I had the mammogram that changed my life. A routine mammogram as part of my overall physical. The doctor had done a thorough (and I do mean thorough) manual examination and felt nothing but as it had been two years since my last mammogram she wrote me a referral. I was blessed at my age to be having regular mammograms...they aren't "the norm" in Ontario until age 50. In my 30s I had felt a lump (turned out to be a cyst) and had it checked with a mammogram which became my baseline. The fact that my maternal grandmother had died of metastasized breast cancer factored into my continuing to be checked on a regular basis.

I had a busy day May 4, 2005 with a job interview at 11:00 a.m. but when I had called to make the appointment for the mammogram, the only time available was 8:00 a.m. that day or I would have had to wait another month. Providence? Divine intervention? I took the appointment without hesitating. Instinct maybe more than anything because I had learned many years ago to listen when that little voice in my head tells me to do something. Your body always has a way of communicating with you.

I spent the day running between appointments and when I reached home to have a cup of tea, I had just sat down when the phone rang. It was 3:00 p.m. There are some details you just never forget. It was my family doctor (actually it was a wonderful young woman who was filling in for my own doctor who was on a maternity leave) telling me there were some concerns with the mammogram and we'd need to do further exams. It appeared that there were microcalcifications on the right breast.

My stomach dropped to the floor and my hand was shaking as I replaced the receiver on the phone. And I knew. I am not a negative person. I'm not a pessimist. But I knew that those microcalcifications were cancer. Was it something in the tone of the doctor's voice? Or the urgency of re-testing and then an appointment with a surgeon? Again, I think it was everything hitting me at once and that "knowing" of me listening to my body and accepting the fact. I kept an open mind during the testing the the two biopsies. The day I met with the surgeon and was told that indeed I did have breast cancer...IDC (Infiltrating Ductal Carcinoma) I was already prepared for what was ahead of me, and everyone else who was part of my world.

It is traditional to mark the anniversaries of survivorship by the date of the last treatment. For me that would be May 2007 when I had completed chemotherapy, radiation and herceptin. However I have never been one to hold completely with tradition. The anniversary I follow is the day I had the mammogram. That was the beginning of my survivorship.

It changed my life in so many ways. Oh yes, cancer is a tenacious, aggressive beast. Once it "marks" you it haunts you for the rest of your life. But there is so much more to life than just having to deal with cancer which I always spell with a small "c". I would never give it a capital - would give it much too much importance. It deserves no respect.

And yet. Through all of the tests and treatments, with all that I put my body through both physically, psychologically and emotionally I don't dwell on the negative aspects. I still say to this day that it was the best thing that ever happened to me.

I rediscovered my faith, I realized that I have always been a spiritual person and my spirit grew and expanded as I allowed myself to live within it. I was reminded daily of the important values in life and I rediscovered joy and beauty. I learned to live each day just as it is, for all that is and all that it can be.

I give thanks every single day for every blessing in my life. And every May 4th I will continue to celebrate the mammogram that saved my life in every.single.way.

Found on a Starbucks Cup...

"You can shower a child with presents or money, but what do they really mean, compared to the most valuable gift of all -- your time? Vacations and special events are nice, but so often the best moments are the spontaneous ones. Being there. Every moment you spend with your child could be the one that really matter."

Tim Russert

Jounalist

Recently Read...

Between researching ancient personal family history and keeping up with daily life, I've managed to "squeeze" in my regular reading (okay, I haven't just been squeezing it in, I've been devoting a great deal of time to it!). There are times when I feel a total sloth for sitting with a book and a coffee (my latest rave is decaf Americano) or a good cup of tea. There are moments when I'll think I'm wasting time and could be doing something more "productive". Trust me, those "moments" don't last very long. Since when is expanding your mind, learning something, being entertained, a "waste of time"? As far as I'm concerned, reading is very productive indeed!

Two of my recent reads were quite different in style and yet equally enjoyable. Both novels carried a similar theme -- about how we can hide who we truly are, usually from others, but sometimes from ourselves. The possibilities that exist when we see ourselves the way others do and when we allow the wall we can create for protection to come down so that others can see our flaws as well as the parts we are happy to promote. It's all about being accepted for who we are. Isn't this what we all wish for in our deepest selves? I thoroughly enjoyed the communication, the interplay and the dynamics of the characters and how each author resolved the issues they were exploring.

"Seeing Me Naked" by Liza Palmer was heart warming and a truly delightful read. I also enjoyed Liza's first book, "Conversations With The Fat Girl". Liza writes with honesty and her characters speak with depth and emotion. I love it when an author creates characters that I can "feel" and respond to -- both positively and negatively. I'm eagerly awaiting her next book. The title alone intrigues me -- "A Field Guide to Burying Your Parents".

"The Elegance of the Hedgehog" by Muriel Barbery was a slow start. The construction of the novel confused me at the beginning as it flipped between the narrations of the two main characters. As slow as it was, I continued to read. Something was compelling me to continue turning the pages. I'm glad that I did. Like a concerto, this novel took it's time to build the notes softly and then filled itself with grace and poise and resounding music. I wept at the ending.

Time for a little lighter fare -- some Ann Cleeves (recently discovered in the mystery section of my library) and some Dorothea Benton Frank, also recently discovered (her books take place in the lowcountry of South Carolina..reminding me very much of Anne Rivers Siddons but they are similar in no other way).

How much time are you prepared to "waste" on reading?!?!?!

*Fragonard's image of "Young Girl Reading" from allposters.com